Teacher Bashing: New Olympic Event?

Sochi, Russia - Even before the games have ended, officials are debating what events to include at the 2018 Olympics to be held in South Korea.

Olympic spokesman Vladmir Grasmoski offered the short list of potential events to reporters yesterday during a press conference in Sochi. The proposed events include: ice fishing, ballroom snowboarding and synchronized figure skiing. But it was teacher bashing that garnered the most attention.  

Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey, who cuts an atypical figure for an Olympian, is expected to serve as the team captain if the event is approved. "We have some Olympic quality players in our country with several of our athletes training for years for this opportunity," noted Christie. Though it would be premature to name team members before trial events, several names have been bandied about including, Michelle Rhee, Scott Brown and Tom Luna. "Our country is fortunate to have so many athletes at such an elite level," Christie smiled as he contemplated the possibilities. 

While teacher bashing enjoys wide appeal in America, representatives from other countries expressed doubts. "I don't think it will make it to the Olympics because the rest of the world doesn't want to play," said Luukos Veikko of Finland. "We have a lot of respect for our educators. I'm not sure we could even field a team," explained the head of the Finnish Olympic Committee.

"Every year we receive dozens of suggestions for events," said Grendalino in response to a question from an ESPN reporter about whether or not teacher bashing actually stood a chance of becoming an Olympic event. "You never know what will make it and what won't. The trick is understanding that trends should not always dictate decisions."

The Haunted School

The Michelle Rhee room proves scary
for both children and adults

New York City - Outside of P.S. 129 in the Bronx is a sign written in chalk on an old blackboard that invites children and adults to "Brave the haunted halls of education reform....if you dare." But if you plan on accepting the chilling invitation to enter, be prepared to wait a while because this modern take on a haunted house is so popular that getting inside can take as long as two hours.

The brainchild of PTA president Molly Shannon has been raking in thousands and thousands of dollars. "We do something like this every year to raise money for the school. But this year the response has just been incredible. We've made more money on our first weekend than we did all last year." The idea came to Shannon when she overheard a conversation between some teachers. "They were talking about how frightening all the changes in education were. Basically it just mushroomed from there."

Governor Cuomo is pro-death penalty for schools

So what exactly is so scary about the Haunted School? To find out, my husband, our two children and I decided to enter at our "own risk."

Upon entering the school, we were greeted by a robot-like coed sporting a Teach for America t-shirt and a forced smile. She promised to guide us through the house but one minute later she mysteriously disappeared and we entered the first leg of our tour without her. Jarring though that was, it was nothing compared to what awaited us. Without warning, "Michelle Rhee" leapt at our oldest child trying to tape his mouth shut. As my son cowered behind me, she threatened to remove my tenure while menacing me with a copy of the Common Core. As we escaped into the hallway, a new TFA guide greeted us. We asked him what happened to our old guide to which he cryptically replied, "She moved on."

In the next room, "Executioner Andrew Cuomo" threatened to execute our school if it failed to make Adequate Yearly Progress. "AYP," Cuomo screamed as he brandished his axe. That made my little girl cry so we stepped into the hall for a breather. Yet another new TFA guide got her some water. She too had no idea what had happened to our previous guides. "Change is good," she said to no one in particular.

Common Core bubble tests prove to
be the most frightening thing of all

Two kids were crying outside the room we next approached. One of them sniffled, "Please don't make me go back in there." What lurked inside? The scariest thing of all, a standardized test hanging from a corporate shill was enough to make both my children ask to go home. So unfortunately, I cannot tell you about the other terrible things that lay in wait for you at the Haunted School.

On a funny note, as we were looking for the exit (our guide had abandoned us again) we wandered into what we thought was a roomful of zombie children but it turned out they were actual kids just preparing for the specialized high school exam.

The haunted school is open daily from 4pm - 10pm. Admission is $5.00 for children under 12 and $10.00 for adults. There is also a hay ride, pumpkin patch and an Arne Duncan clown who hilariously attempts to juggle ethics and money.

Reality Alert: 

Interested in how we came to write this? Go to: Michelle Rhee talks about taping students' mouths shut and Gov. Cuomo: Schools that fail deserve the death penalty

Queen Bee's Radical Promotions

New York City - As we've previously reported, Michelle Rhee has been garnering publicity for her book "Radical" by engaging in unusual stunts around media outlet rich New York City. Today's stunt placed Ms. Rhee at the Barnes and Noble on Broadway and 82nd Street where she swallowed bumble bees at the rate of two every ten seconds. While this may seem like an odd way to garner attention for a book, HarperCollins, the book's publisher, reminded us that Ms. Rhee gained respect from her first class by swatting and then swallowing a bee in front of them. You can't make this stuff up, folks (well maybe just a little bit).

Reality Alert: 

Interested in how we came to write this? Go to: The Michelle Rhee You Don't Know and Michelle Rhee's Book is a Huge Failure

Radical Promoter

A sticky mishap cost Rhee the world record

New York City - To promote the release of her new book, "Radical," Michelle Rhee attempted to set a world record by duct taping the mouths of twenty children in less than a minute. The old record (yes, there is one) of 18 people in one minute, was held by a serial killer from Indiana. Sadly Ms. Rhee's efforts fell short. She had a strong start, applying the adhesive material flawlessly to the first eight children but at the ninth, the tape stuck to her fingers and it threw off her timing. She fell far short of the record, managing to seal the mouths of only 14 kids in 60 seconds. Commenting on her performance, Ms. Rhee admitted, "I should have practiced more. You can't just rest on your laurels."

Giving New Meaning To Class Action Lawsuit

Newark, NJ - On Thursday morning, there was a shouting match outside of Elma Street Elementary School as a teacher and several parents exchanged angry words.

"I deserve that $5,000 bonus," the teacher yelled.

"Well if you're such a good teacher then why didn't my boy pass that exam?" countered a parent.

What was the hullabaloo about? Several parents had discovered that they and their children were being sued by fourth grade teacher Sandra Wettfeld. In a legal maneuver widely acknowledged to be the first of its kind, the New Jersey educator filed suit against five of her former students and their families for loss of income. The basis for Wettfeld's lawsuit was explained that afternoon at the law offices of Slaughter & Hem.

Lawrence Slaughter, who specializes in educational law, described Ms. Wettfeld's case, "Basically, we are suing because under the Newark Teachers Union contract, Ms. Wettfeld can earn an extra $5,000 if she is rated as "Highly Effective" which is largely based on her students' test scores. Several of her students did not perform as they should have which resulted in her losing that bonus money. So she's looking to be compensated by those students and their families who failed to live up to expectations."

Wettfeld explained, "No one teaches to the test better than I do. So I knew I would get some bonus money when the scores came back." She paused to wipe a tear from her eye, "I stayed late, wrote great lessons and offered extra help but I've got students who don't come to school regularly. Students who don't sit still because they're hungry or distracted. Students who don't do their homework or go to bed on time. And those things are not my fault; they're the kids' fault and the parents' fault. Why should I suffer?"

Though not yet named as defendants, Slaughter's law partner May Hem is researching the viability of adding the school district and teachers union to the lawsuit. "Let's face it, we're going after the families because their kids failed the tests but if you want to get justice, you have to go after the clowns who thought this type of compensation was just.

Although the school district and mayor's office both refused to comment on the lawsuit, Newark Teachers Union President Joseph Del Grosso called it, "a step in the wrong direction." Addressing the media on Friday, Mr. Del Grosso said, "Parents, teachers and students should not have an adversarial relationship but once money is introduced, well that has a way of changing things." Asked if he should have thought of that before agreeing to the contract that ties teacher income to student test performance, Del Grosso commented, "I think some things are unforeseeable."

Perhaps less unforeseeable, the slew of virtually identical lawsuits that have been filed in other states since Wettfeld's press conference. Though the legal ground for such cases is still swampy, in just a few days eight similar suits have been filed in Washington D.C. and Oregon where merit pay systems are also in place. Legal pundits are watching to see the outcome of these cases with great interest. Slaughter put it this way, "We understand this case is charting new territory which of course carries some risks. However, this territory has the potential to be quite lucrative."

Back at Elma Street Elementary, parent and named defendant Sam Oliver seemed less annoyed than embarrassed and frightened as he looked over legal documents, "Our family had a tough year. I lost my job and well maybe we weren't as academically-focused at home as we could have been but... we just don't have this kind of money. I don't even know if I can afford a lawyer."

Michelle Rhee's organization StudentsFirst released this bold statement in reference to the suit, "To paraphrase Arne Duncan's iconic quote about the education opportunities Hurricane Katrina created, we believe that tying teacher income to student scores was the best thing to happen in Newark schools because strife creates opportunity."

Reality Alert: 

Interested in how we came to write this? Go to: The Newark Teachers Contract: My Final Word and Test Scores and the Newark Teachers Contract and DC Program Ties Teacher Salaries To Student Test Scores and  Oregon Schools Begin to Tie Teacher Pay to Student Test Scores

Have You Heard The One About....

...the woman who enrolled her child in a new school?  After the principal welcomed them to the learning community, the mother made a request, "It is very important to me that my child have a first year teacher."

The principal responded with a nod, "We have several first year teachers on staff."

The woman continued, "And can you guarantee that my child will get the teacher who has received the least amount of preparation for the job?"

"Um, two of our new teachers only attended five weeks of training this summer," the confused principal replied.

"Wonderful," the woman answered. "And of those two teachers, would you please ensure that my child gets the one who is most likely to leave the profession?"

The puzzled principal hesitated for a moment, "I'm afraid they will both probably leave teaching in two to three years."

"Well then either one will do," the satisfied mother smiled.

"While I'm glad you are satisfied, I must say your request is an unusual one. May I ask why you would want the teacher who is least experienced, least trained and least likely to stay in the profession?"

The woman smiled knowingly, "Oh that's easy. Michelle Rhee said they make the best teachers."

Over the Educational Cliff

Washington D.C. - In an unusual moment of candor for a politician, U.S. Senator LaLa Verdad of New York sent this letter to her constituents yesterday:

"Louise, no matter what happens, I'm glad I came with you."

Lately my office has been receiving communication from constituents about the state of education. Some of you have expressed annoyance over the frequency and length of the tests your child has had to take. Some of you were surprised to find out that the teacher you and your child love has been deemed "ineffective" as determined by value-added measures. A few of you were worried that the government maintains decades of data on your child. Some of you are angry that the unproven Common Core is forcing teachers to robotically deliver lessons and demanding six-year-olds read oodles of non-fiction. My question to you is: where the hell were you people as our children went over the "educational cliff?"

I know, I know you didn't realize all these "reforms" were effecting your kid or your school district so you didn't care. Well now that it's dawned on you that it is your kid and your district perhaps you will wake up and force me (and all your political leaders) to do something about it. I am, after all, largely your puppet. I display very little leadership on my own, preferring instead to form my opinions and choose my battles based on public opinion and advice from generous campaign donors.

So if I hear from Michelle Rhee and her well-financed political action committee (I mean 501(c)4 organization) Students First more than I hear from you, guess who I'm going to listen to? And if you are so uninformed that you think Students for Educational Reform is actually run by a grassroots band of students then you won't mind if I have a few drinks with their hedge fund-, charter school-affiliated, no hidden agenda here board of directors.

Our country drove over the educational cliff years ago with Michelle "Thelma" Rhee, Wendy "Louise" Kopp and a host of other bad drivers taking turns at the wheel. So if you'd like to hoist them from the driver's seat then you must act. Dear constituents, get your panties in a twist and let me know how No Child Left Behind, Race to the Top and now the Common Core standards have negatively altered the playing field for your American schoolchild. Because otherwise, I just don't give a shit.

To contact any member of Congress: Contacting the Congress

Reality Alert: 

Interested in how we came to write this? Read Students for Education Reform and A Little OxyContin with that #Edreform? and Obama's Dreadful Education Agenda and Students for Education Reform and the War on Teachers

Election Results: Public Education Loses

New York City - From their broadcast studios at 30 Rockefeller Center in New York City, MSNBC called the presidential election only one minute after polls had closed on election night. At 9:01pm EST, Rachel Maddow announced that public education had lost. "With only 1% of precincts reporting, MSNBC can confirm with a 0% margin of error that public education has lost." Citing the 100% likelihood that either President Obama or Mitt Romney would win Maddow said, "Given that both candidates support policies that promote privatization of education while ignoring fundamental flaws in our economic system that perpetuate childhoods spent in poverty, we are confident in declaring public education a loser this evening."

Comments on the loss came from many circles. NBC broadcaster Brian Williams expressed relief, "I was afraid we might have to actually invite some public school teachers to next year's Education Nation but with this defeat, it is clear we can continue to pander to the union-crushing corporate privatizing agenda." Randi Weingarten, president of the American Federation of Teachers, issued this statement, "No matter who wins, we will semi-respectfully hold our nose to work with him." Michelle Rhee, CEO of Students First, was too drunk to comment, having begun her celebratory consumption of libations some time in October.

Who Should Be More Insulted? Courts Will Decide

Coulter objects to being compared to Rhee...

Los Angeles - Ann Coulter has filed a lawsuit against writer Jeff Bryant alleging defamation of character. The offending comment by Bryant appeared in a recently authored piece for "Campaign for America's Future" in which he referred to founder and CEO of Students First Michelle Rhee as "a sort of - 'education Ann Coulter.'"

At a press conference Coulter's attorney, Max Dewey explained his client's lawsuit as follows, "Throughout her career, Ms. Coulter has been called some pretty foul names but to compare her to Michelle Rhee sinks below even the lowest of journalistic integrity levels."

No doubt when Mr. Bryant wrote the article entitled, "Michelle Rhee Misreads 'Shift Among Democrats' On Education" he expected to stir the education policy pot. After all, he describes Rhee as a "lobbyist" and shill for the billionaire-funded so-called "education reform" movement. However, it is also probably true that he did not anticipate being sued by the likes of confrontational, conservative commentator Coulter as she has been called just about every name in the book. However, that is not how her attorneys see it.

.... and Rhee objects to being compared to Coulter

Sanford Cheatem, another partner at the high-powered firm representing Coulter, raised what will no doubt be a point of contention during litigation, when he characterized the statement by Bryant as "disparaging" and said that it had "had negative effects on Coulter's image."

The press conference ended with a plea from the law firm's managing partner Clifford Howe. "People should be aware that words have the power to hurt. Our client's emotional well-being has been compromised by this comparison to Michelle Rhee and we will not let it stand."

When reached for a comment about the lawsuit, Michelle Rhee said she was also considering suing Jeff Bryant for defamation. "Maybe I can join Coulter's suit. After all, no one wants to be compared to her either."

Reality Alert: 

Interested in how we came to write this? Read Michelle Rhee Misreads 'Shift Among Democrats' On Education

From Slime to Self-flagellation: Teachers Prepare for New School Year

New York City - While some teachers prepare to return to their classrooms by reviewing curriculum and purchasing needed supplies, many veteran educators get ready in less traditional ways.  We sent reporters to each of the boroughs to uncover their secrets.

Staten Island
Beginning early in August, Ginny Evans, who has taught middle schoolers at I.S. 352 for twelve years, practices holding her urine. "When school lets out, I get used to peeing when I want to.  Then when August comes around, I can barely go four hours without urinating and that will just not do," Mrs. Evans shakes her head. "I've done a lot of Kegels and had a few accidents but now I can hold it for almost nine hours. My bladder is almost ready for back-to-back coverages plus lunch duty on an after-school tutoring day," Evans says with a proud smile.

Queens
Meanwhile over in Queens, you can find pre-K teacher Valerie Winkle in her backyard, donning
goggles and standing in a kiddie pool. "Fire away," she yells to her ten-year-old son Bobby, who is

Slime helps Winkle prepare for the coming school year

armed with a toy gun filled with Nickeloden slime. Dutifully and delightedly, Bobby pulls the trigger. Almost instantly his mom is covered in gooey green muck. Winkle calmly wipes the ooze from her face and forces these words, "That's ok sweetheart." She repeats this cycle approximately twelve times a day during the summer months. The eight-year veteran of Community School 142 explains her training matter-of-factly, "Since I teach the little ones, I know that several times during the year I will be the displeased recipient of bodily fluids which are not my own. This training allows me to graciously handle all the vomit, snot etcetera that awaits me."

Manhattan

Mr. Gold practices dodging spit balls

While some teachers focus on controlling fluids, high school teachers build up other skills. "I've practiced dodging projectiles for years but with the relaxed discipline code, it's especially important," advises seventeen-year veteran William Gold, who will teach ninth grade English at John Lindsay High School. Many times throughout the day and always without warning, Gold can count on his wife Mabel to hurl paper clips and/or spit balls at him. Mabel smiles as she describes her husband's progress, "At the end of July, I nailed him almost every time but now he anticipates my every move." During a demonstration of his skills, the fifty-two-year-old impressed with Matrix-like speed and agility. Assessing his own preparedness, Mr. Gold boasts, "I'm ready for the little pishers."

Bronx
Silence is the hallmark of Mr. Wallace Edwards' school preparation. "I've taught for nineteen years at the Murdoch School for Communication and for fifteen of them, I've practiced biting my tongue." Edwards says he mostly utilizes the skill during staff meetings and professional development. "Sometimes you want to make suggestions or point out more effective ways to do something but over the years I've realized the administration doesn't really want to hear from teachers." Wallace, whose tongue shows visible scarring, says the skill is also useful at home. "I'm pretty sure our relationship is better for having perfected this skill."  His life-partner Dan Engels is not so sure. "Did he tell you he suffers from ulcers?"

Brooklyn

Teacher Lori uses self-flagellation to
prepare for annual abuse

Perhaps the most grueling efforts are made by Dominic Lori, a veteran educator of twenty-five years. "I beat myself twelve to fifteen times a day with a cat o' nine tails." Asked why he practices self-flagellation the soft-spoken Lori explains, "It hardens me to abuse." But if you're thinking Lori instructs hostile juvenile delinquents, think again. "Oh heavens no. The students are fabulous but at every other level, people seem bent on vilifying teachers so it's just my way of getting ready for it." Who exactly is abusing teachers? The Edward Grout High School history teacher has no trouble describing the culprits. "There's Mayor Bloomberg who shifted the responsibility of learning from students to teachers and then shamed us with the publication of discredited value-add scores. We have political leaders like Jeb Bush who compare neighborhood public schools to choosing milk. And of course other reformers like Michelle Rhee conveniently ignore the effects of poverty on student achievement and never discuss the National Assessment of Educational Progress scores which are at their highest point in history for many student groups." Mr. Lori sees the status quo in education as revolving around teacher attacks. "My training simply acclimates me to the pain," Lori says glumly. When it was suggested that perhaps the United Federation of Teachers could help, Lori volunteered, "They already have. They bought me a hair shirt."

Reality Alert: 

Interested in how we came to write this? Read Disciplinary code revisions could reduce student suspensions and  How to Demoralize Teachers and Jeb Bush's Ed Speech and My View: Rhee is wrong and misinformed

Defender of the Status Quo: America's Newest Superhero

"Holy Incompetent Teachers!" Rhee will be
generously supported by her many minions,
including Joel Klein and Arne Duncan.

California - Faster than dismissal on a Friday. More powerful than the smell of cafeteria pizza. Able to shut down a public school in a single bound.

Look! Over in Sacramento! It's a self-promoter. It's an education deformer. It's the Defender of the Status Quo, Michelle Rhee.

Strange visitor from a another planet who came to Earth with powers and abilities far beyond those of union presidents. Defender of the Status Quo - uses tests scores for unintended purposes, ignores facts that do not support her specious arguments, and, with her many minions, fights the never-ending battle to crush American unions.

How did Rhee, already Queen of StudentsFirst, win this noble position? A bi-partisan board of electors made the unanimous selection. "There really was no other choice," explained billionaire David Koch, who was flanked by fellow board members billionaire Bill Gates and billionaire Eli Broad at a press conference announcing the honor. Koch beamed, "Her ability to keep the media and public focused on false notions about education is unrivaled."

Rhee's number one responsibility will be to continue to manipulate the public into believing there is an education crisis related, not to poverty but to, lazy 53 hour-a-week working, over-paid Hyundai-driving, whine about a need to test for efficacy before instituting Common Core standards, so-called "educators." 

Like any great superhero, Rhee has her enemies including, the evil math genius Mr. Brandenburg, the fearless Leo Nie and Biting Burris. Her arch nemesis, however, is The Ravitch, a nimble character whose superpowers include tweeting at incredible speeds, telling the truth and knowledgeably citing education history.


Still, most people are betting on the DSQ. David Koch certainly is; he ended his press conference with these words, "I'm sure I speak for all of America when I say thank you Defender of the Status Quo for your incomparable service to our country and its corporations, um I mean children."

Reality Alert: 

Interested in how we came to write this? Read Talk About Double Standards! and the comment by Michael Fiorillo and Will the Gates Agenda of Gathering Data About Teachers Abolish Poverty and A World Without Public Students? and Jon Stewart's "Crisis in Dairyland"

"Bagel Summit" for Randi and Campbell?

Washington D.C. - American Federation of Teachers President Randi Weingarten and former CNN journalist Campbell Brown received an unexpected invitation today from President Barack Obama. At a press conference, Obama invited both women to the White House for “some bagels and lox” (a nod to the fact that both women are Jews or have lived in New York City we don’t know which).  He expressed his hope that the “Bagel Summit” would "cool things off between the two."

The women have been digitally feuding since Ms. Brown charged, in a Wall Street Journal piece, that teacher unions allow sexual predators to stay in the classroom.  Ms. Weingarten shot back that this was nonsense, citing both the language of the UFT/NYC contract and the Fourth Amendment. The two then exchanged battling tweets for 48-hours. The Twitter war caught the eye of some in the beltway, including Politico and the Washington Post. Thus bringing it to the president's attention.

“The fact that it [the Twitter war] has garnered so much attention is a testimony to the fact that this is a sensitive issue,” the President said.  “They are both outstanding people who just, you know, lost their goddamn minds." Asked to comment on the President’s words, Weingarten said, “Well one of us is outstanding.”

The invitation has its critics. Michelle Rhee suggested that the summit might have a negative impact on education reform.  “Quite frankly, we don’t want union leaders to be seen eating in public. It is not in our best interests that they be perceived as human.”

At last report, neither Campbell nor Weingarten had accepted the president's offer.

Reality Alert: Interested in how we came to write this? Read Sara Jaffe here.

Sit Down for Education

Press Release:
Recognizing the needs of lazy Americans, Michelle Rhee and Jonah Edelman have announced they are forming a new organization to be called, "Sit Down for Education."  It will align its efforts with Edelman's other organization, Stand Up for Education.

At a press conference on Wednesday, the self-important Ms. Rhee explained, "Many Americans would like to support our efforts to blindly make educational changes without checking for efficacy but they have complained that they just don't want to make the effort. With our new organization, they can Tweet and sign on-line petitions from the comfort of their own beds."

Mr. Edelman, most famous for disappointing his civil rights advocating mother, continued, "Now lazy people can also participate in over-simplifying complex issues and maligning educators without the unnecessary effort of having to get up, learn about the topics or understand what they're talking about."

Joel Klein, who will serve on the board of Sit Down for Education, praised Rhee, "I was gobsmacked when she shared this idea with me." Conversely, Marian Wright Edelman refused to comment on her son's efforts to privatize public education through the joint efforts of powerful financiers and weak-minded politicians, "I have nothing to say about that young man."

Teachers Suck More Than They Used To

Washington D.C. - There is an epidemic of bad teaching in U.S. schools, reports the federal Centers for Disease Control and it shows no signs of waning.  At a press conference on Tuesday, Dr. Haniff Gupta said, "Based on flawed tests administered once a year to students, we have determined that teachers suck more than they used to.  We're trying to get this under control but we're not sure what is causing it."  

The highest rates of infection among teachers seem to be in neighborhoods with the greatest percentage of students qualifying for free lunch. Additionally, the disease seems especially virulent among middle school teachers.  "I don't know what I did wrong.  It's a really difficult job," whined 7th grade English teacher Jennifer Rose of I.S. 200 in the Bronx. Dr. Gupta, whose study was partially funded by the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, noted that "bellyaching" was one of the symptoms of Bad Teaching Disease (BTD).  Other signs include pointing to studies that evidence no relationship between student exams and teacher competence and following Diane Ravitch on Twitter.

Scientists are also having a difficult time determining why the plague seems localized to under-served communities.  "While we are grateful it hasn't spread, it is an unusual phenomenon," noted Gupta.  

"Thank God, it hasn't infected our schools," said Mindy DeHoog whose daughter Blakely attends the Gifted and Talented School for the Children of Job Creators (GTSCJC), a public school on the Upper East Side of Manhattan. "I would hate to have to move to the suburbs."

The CDC's press release noted that, "The public should rest assured knowing the government is doing everything it can to blame teachers unions for the outbreak.  Meanwhile, our best scientists are on the case and we expect to announce an untested cure as soon as Michelle Rhee tells us what it is."

Randi Weingarten, head of the American Federation of Teachers, could not be reached for comment though she was spotted wearing a surgical mask.