What you are about to read is NOT real news. It is satire. Where possible we have provided links to the real stories/issues that inspire us at the bottom of each article.

Follow us on Twitter @Students_Last

Friday, August 3, 2012

Sit Down for Education

Press Release:
Recognizing the needs of lazy Americans, Michelle Rhee and Jonah Edelman have announced they are forming a new organization to be called, "Sit Down for Education."  It will align its efforts with Edelman's other organization, Stand Up for Education.

At a press conference on Wednesday, the self-important Ms. Rhee explained, "Many Americans would like to support our efforts to blindly make educational changes without checking for efficacy but they have complained that they just don't want to make the effort. With our new organization, they can Tweet and sign on-line petitions from the comfort of their own beds."

Mr. Edelman, most famous for disappointing his civil rights advocating mother, continued, "Now lazy people can also participate in over-simplifying complex issues and maligning educators without the unnecessary effort of having to get up, learn about the topics or understand what they're talking about."

Joel Klein, who will serve on the board of Sit Down for Education, praised Rhee, "I was gobsmacked when she shared this idea with me." Conversely, Marian Wright Edelman refused to comment on her son's efforts to privatize public education through the joint efforts of powerful financiers and weak-minded politicians, "I have nothing to say about that young man."

No comments:

Post a Comment