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Saturday, September 29, 2012

Stripper Fired For Being A Teacher

Teachers rejected: "We have our standards"
Grand Rapids, Michigan - Stripper Bunny Halter has filed a federal employment discrimination lawsuit against her former employer strip club White Glove, claiming she was fired one year ago due to her previous employment as a teacher.

"I know I made some bad choices," Ms. Halter apologized at a press conference organized by her attorney Gloria Allred. "But I've left the education field now and I don't think I should be punished for trying to support my family. I've really turned my life around."

Ms. Halter took a job as a teacher briefly when a medical issue left her unable to pole dance. "The bills kept piling up and I didn't know what else to do. I was desperate. I'm not proud of what I did but at the time taking a job as a lazy greedy fifth grade teacher seemed like my only choice," Bunny sniffed into the microphone before burying her head in her lawyer's shoulder.

White Glove owner, Sid Vasdeferens held his own press conference in front of his popular establishment. "For God's sake, I'm trying to run a business and even we have our standards," implored Vasdeferens. "Once our clients found out we employed teachers, they were turned off. We don't need no teachers giving us a bad name."

Attorney Allred said her client was suing for $110,000 in lost wages, which is what Bunny anticipated earning as an exotic dance last year. Interestingly that sum is almost twice as much as the average teacher's salary in Michigan.

Reached for comment by phone, President David Hecker of the Michigan chapter of the American Federation of Teachers said, "This is what happens when a profession is attacked day after day. Respect for the teaching profession has been suffering a death of a thousand cuts and it has got to stop." Meanwhile the president of the American Federation of Strippers union, Randy Randi said she was, "Looking into the merits of Ms. Halter's lawsuit."

3 comments:

  1. Strippers and Teacher Bashing. Grading Schools of Education. Melissa Harris-Perry and Pedro finally get real about testing and poverty. @ The Chalk Face internet radio. Listen now and Listen here. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/chalkface/2012/09/30/at-the-chalk-face-progressive-edreform-talk

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  2. Nice & Interesting post..I love it when you post new and exciting things!
    Cambodian Translation

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  3. Premise is brilliant, but you should have ended it by the middle of the third graf. Less is more.

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